Daily Market News

1. Patni:-sharab peene ke baad kya tumhe mera naam bhi yaad nahin rehta? Pati:-pee lene ke baad toh main har gam bhool jata hoon,meri jaan. 2. Beta : papa, main itna bada kab hounga ki main mummy se bina puchhe Bahar ja sakun? Baap : beta abhi itna bada toh mein bhi nahi hua. 3. Patni: aap bahut mote ho gaye ho. Pati: tum bhi toh kitni moti ho gayi ho. Patni: main toh maa banne wali hoon Pati: main bhi toh baap banne wala hoon 4. Sawaal: biwi maike jaa kar shohar ko har roz phone kyon karti hai.... Jawab: taa ki shohar ko yaad rahe ki musibat abhi tali nahi, phir aane wali hai. 5. Dulha Dulhan se : Tumhara koi Boy Friend tha kya? Dulhan chup rahi Dulha: main iss khamoshi ko kya samjhun? Dulhan: kaminey ruk jaa ginne toh de.

Har kamyabi par aapka naam hoga. Aapke har kadam par duniya ka salaam hoga. Mushkilo ka samna himmat se karna. Dua hai ek din waqt bhi aapka gulam hoga.

Anasagar or bajrangad ka kinara na hota, Vaishali ka wo najara na hota, Glitz, mridang, maya mandir ne cinema sudhara na hota, To AJMER me pdne wala student awara na hota..

Pappu :Papa,Dulhan Lal Rang Ke Kapde Hi Kyo Pehanti Hai ? Papa :Khatre Ke Sanket Ke Liye Lal Rang Ka  Upyog hota Hai.  |

Aashikon ka dimaag hota h khaali, Tabi milti nahi unko gharwaali, Gulam banke faste hai ishq ke jaal me, Aur kehte hai "Oye ! Maine ladki patali"..

Sardar ke Ghar Chor aaya, Sardar ne dekha To chor Bhaga Sardar bhagta-2 usse bhee Agay nikal gaya Sardar : Ek to Chori uper se Hum se race.

I Decided to SUICIDE. I Went to Railway Track... And Then Your message Came, I Thought "Jab tumhare jese JEE Rahe Hai... TO MAIN KYU MARU...?

Whatsapp jokes - four funny jokes on husband and wife ------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1. Possible Reasons When A Man Opens a car door for wife : 1) The Car Is New. 2) The Wife Is New 3) (Most Imp) She Is Not His Wife --------------------------------------------------------------------------- 2. Wife is angry as hubby stands too close to a beautiful girl in bus, a few seconds later the girl slaps him for pinching. Hubby to wife : I swear I didn't. Wife : I know, I did it... ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- 3. Police Officer: I arrest people, But, when I go home, I'm under house arrest, by Wife Professor: I give lectures to students, But, when I go home, I get Lectured hourly, by wife CEO: I'm the Boss, But, when I go home, I always feel like an employee, by wife Judge: I give Justice, but when I go home, I Beg for Justice, by wife. -----------------------...

Pani me tairna machali ka style, Hawa me udna panchi ka style, Different Msg bhejna mera style, Fokat ke Msgs padna aapka style...!

I can buy gifts but not Love, i can pretend to Smile, but not to be Happy. I can lie to others, but not to you. I do have many brothers... but none as SWEET as you..

Your aim in life should be "54321O" 5-Five digit salary. 4-Four wheeler vehicle. 3-Three room home. 2-Two cute childern. 1-One loving life partner. 0-Enemy.

Bin laden's son was studying in an American school. Teacher asked him 'I have 4 apple.How can i share among 5 people?' His ans - KILL ONE.

Santa sharab pee ke tala kholne Lga... Hath kapne ki vajh se tala nhi khula... Banta bola 'tala me khol deta hu... Santa-Tala me khol lunga tu makan pakad ye Hill raha h.

Pagal - MujhSe katrina shadi ke liye razi ho geyi hai. 2nd pagal- Aa gayi na apni aukat per vo, Me bhi dekhta hu mujse talak kaise leti hai vo...

City Star Santa train ki patri par so gaya.. Banta- Train ayegi to mar jayega Santa-Upar se plane gaya kuch ni hua to train kya chiz hai ?

BETA : Papa meri teacher kitni pyari hai na ? BAAP : Beta teacher MAA ke barabar hoti hai. BETA : Aap to hmesha apne he chakkar me rahna.

Ek Moti Aurat ne chor pkra aur us ke upar beth gai... Nokar se : Ja Police ko bula la.. Nokar : Meri Chappal kho gai hai.. Chor Chillaya : Saale Meri pahen le, par Jaldi ja...

Padosi : Yaar tere ghar se Hamesha Hasne ki Awaze aati hai. Khushi ka Raaz kya h? Meri wife muje jute marti hai Lag jaye to wo hasti hai, na lage to mai hasta hu.

Dekho mausam kitna suhana hai. Thandi thandi fizao ka aana jana hai. kuch sms kar liya karo dost. Is balance se kya apni shaadi ka card chapwana hai...

Sardar-Tumhe rajput kyo kehte hain? Rajput-hum apni baat pe jaan de dete hai. aur tumhe sardar kyun kehte hai? Sardar-hum bina baat K jaan de dete hai.